On the internet, there is this thing that I am sure you have heard of called Throwback Thursday. It’s a day when people look back at how their children have grown, how they have lost weight, how they have changed, etc. In life sometimes it’s helpful to look back at memories because you can see how far you’ve grown.
Yesterday some photos popped up recently in my Google photos which caused me to pause and reflect on what the Lord has done in my life. Three years ago, I came home for my brother’s graduation. I was so proud of him and in fact even jealous. My brother who was told he wouldn’t do much was graduating college. I believed in him and told him often. I knew the Lord had a high calling for him.
I also looked back at those photos three years ago and saw a woman who was struggling.
One of the ways I remind myself of God goodness is by keeping a journal. I keep a journal to daily remind me of the goodness of the Lord. It’s fun to keep a journal because you can write in it and then, later on, go back and look at the growth or things you still need to work on. My journal has a number of things inside it. It has things that I’m thankful for, dreams, things the Lord has spoken to me over the years, prayers, and my scripture journaling.
I go back over my journal and see how the Lord answered my prayers. I see how the Lord worked in my children’s lives and I see how he worked in me.
When I see this photo of the woman in the pink shirt and jean jacket standing at the most beautiful place in the world. I see her trying to smile in the picture and not show her teeth because she hated her smile. I remember smiling in that photo and hoping the camera didn’t actually capture a smile but instead just the closed lips that I had.
I see someone who didn’t know her worth. I see a woman who was doing her best to serve the Lord and struggling with her situation. I see a woman who knew who she was in Jesus but didn’t actively walk in it. She struggled with fear, anxiety, and worry. She struggled because she didn’t feel worth loving. She struggled because she didn’t know that she could do things that God had called her to do.
As I sat and looked at this photo, I saw a woman who had grown. I even did a side by side comparison where you can see physically my smile is better, my hair is longer, my sense of style is definitely better.
It’s amazing how the Lord has worked in my life. I’ll tell you the good first and yes we will cover the ugly as well. First, my smile was restored in 2016 because of my friend Stormy and a beautiful letter she wrote. I am so blessed that I can smile again. That smile brought back my joy!! I have no idea why I let a physical flaw as a smile rob my joy but it did. It made me feel less than a human.
I also have a job which I work in customer service and help others daily. I love helping people and doing the job that I do. I have had a year of health care and my health is stable. Praise the Lord!!
I have grown closer to the Lord where I know to grab my Bible and pray and seek His face. Not my will but your will be done. WOW. That’s growth alone. I don’t want my will for my life because that would not be God’s best. But I want God’s best for my life because I know that God has great plans for my life and for my family. Just like I know God has great plans for your life and for your family.
Now the ugly – I’m facing a divorce because of a lot of various issues that someday I’ll cover. I posted a while back that I was going to stay silent and just hold Jesus’s hand. That’s what I’m doing until I feel ready to talk about it all. I don’t have my children with me. This is the hardest thing of this journey. I miss my kids. I miss hearing the loud noises, the video game yelling at the screen, the hustle and bustle of my daily life. I know we will get to be together soon.
The Lord can bring growth and change if you allow him to. Let the Lord work in your life and in your heart today. Ask him what He has for you.
So how can you grow when you face hard times.
3 Steps to help you Know Your Worth
- Fix your eyes on Jesus – I love this verse in 2 Corinthians 4 which says, ” So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.” Don’t fix your eyes on your circumstance but fix your eyes on the master of the storm.
- Read your Bible daily. Soak yourself in the word of God. Find scriptures that apply to your situation and write them everywhere. I had a notebook for this and still do. I would grab it when I was feeling anxious or doubt that God could.
- Surround yourself with a strong support system. You need support. You need people to remind you that you can keep pressing through. I have these people. I have family, friends, church family, and online friends who remind me God’s got this!!!
Remember you can do all things through Christ who will strengthen you and guide you. He sees you and He loves you!!